It is July 3, 2005…almost a year since Dad left us.  I am sitting in his office while squirrel’s snack on purple sticker flowers outside the screen door.  It is peaceful here in Poway…just like Dad used to talk about.  It has been the most difficult year of our lives and we still can’t believe Dad is gone.  At times it was unbearable.  Who knew that Father's Day could throw such punch to the heart? And, when will the strange sensations go away? The strange sensations that we can still call him on the phone…that he will still come walking into the living room making a joke or playing some bizarre character. 

I have been living in Poway for almost a year.  When Dad died my life in Pacific Beach ended and I knew I wanted to be in living his home immediately…feeling him all around me.  When Dad left he also left us with mice, bees, rattle snakes and a house that was seemingly falling apart.  I remember sitting under the palm trees at my apartment by the beach when Dad would call and say, “I shot another rattle snake today.”  I would say, “Oh Wow…be careful Dad!”  But, it didn’t really sink in…what it is like to have rattle snakes slither past the kitchen door or King snakes somehow get into the house and greet us in the living room.  I have eyed the shotguns many times in my deliberation of, “Should I or shouldn’t I?”

Dad lived for the last decade as a bachelor and there was much work to be done, especially after the damage of the fires.    In this last year I have felt like a pioneer woman at times…and a sad girl missing her Dad all of the time.  But, with the sadness there have been blessings…many blessings.  The house is looking good and we are blessed that Dad left us enough money to chop down the burned trees, paint, replace and repair.  I think Dad and grandma would be proud of our new surroundings.  However, Dad, we still have the rodent problem…can you please stop them from eating our cars?

As most of you know, Dad was a “pioneer man” himself and he had his hands in many different projects.  It made for a complicated estate, especially since we didn’t know about many of his projects and have had to find out about them by sifting through thousands of papers.  This is not uncommon when loved ones die and I urge you to settle your financial issues and plan your estate now.  You never know when you or your loved ones will spend their last moments on earth.  As it is, Dads paperwork will not dissolve for, at least another year.   So, for now, this is our life…settling the affairs of a man who lived a phenomenal life.  Being the executor of an estate is not an easy, fun or exciting job but I am happy to do it for an incredible Dad who filled my life with joy, and meaning ~ and still does everyday.

Many of you have not kept in touch with us this last year.  Understandably, the world spins quickly these days and sometimes odd and mundane tasks take priority over “connecting” with people.  But, we hope you will take the time to connect with us.  Dad had many friends who were like family to him…we hope you will feel comfortable reaching out and keeping the bond to Dad strong.

Happy Independence Day, 2005 (One of Dad’s favorite holidays) 

Dondi Simone Dahlin